I spent most Monday doing a whole bunch of things. Writing was not one of them. No, that morning, I found myself staring at the screen, wondering what the hell I was going to write. I scribbled lines of poetry, and then erased them just as fast. I had nothing. I was empty.

So I did other things; I played with my cat. I cleaned my apartment. I practiced yoga. I worked on my flow arts, and by doing so, I cleaned myself.

I haven’t done any of these things for a period of time. My cat is displeased if I don’t play with him for 15 minutes in the morning. My apartment? The carpet needed vacuuming two weeks ago and the litter box had pellets all to and fro. As for yoga, I haven’t taken a moment to do any for fear of hurting my knee further. Ditto for flow arts.

The irony being that a slow yoga routine and relaxed flow arts practice were probably the best choices I could make for my knee.

But as I was doing all of that, I put on the Tao Te Ching as translated by Wayne Dyer. I have a Google Doc transcription here.

If you don’t know, the Tao Te Ching is a foundational text for Taoism, also known as “the Way.” Commonly attributed to Laozi, the author’s status is much alike Homer’s of ancient Greece. There’s half a mind among scholars to consider Laozi a composite author and the text itself to be a compilation of various works.

The Wayne Dyer version has it faults, but when paired with chillstep music, his interpretations have never failed to illuminate. In particular, there are plentiful passages that have helped me move through this period of my life. The three following have helped me to avoid despair as I was lost in the woods of writers block and unemployment, searching for some sense of meaning that I could make my own.

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There is a time for being ahead
and a time for being behind;
a time for being in motion
and a time for being at rest;
a time for being vigorous
and a time for being exhausted;
a time for being safe
and a time for being in danger.

This one is pretty straightforward to me: rather than trying to force myself to be a writer at all times of the day, it’s become pretty clear that if the inclination is not present, then I would just be wasting my time staring at a screen all day. Making the time to clean myself and my apartment, to perform maintenance and the like, is a blessing that I sometimes can take for granted, and then neglect.

This passage is a great reminder that every state of being, every activity has its time. I might feel like I’m behind, but in fact, I might just be ahead and sense the opposite. Above all, by allowing myself to feel these things, I allow myself to have an understanding of them. At the end of the day, I am ephemeral, but my knowledge of myself is eternal.

True words are not beautiful;
beautiful words are not true.
Good men do not argue;
those who argue are not good.

This one is actually a passage in which I prefer the Stephen Mitchell translation, “wise men don’t need to prove their point; men who need to prove their point aren’t wise.”

However, in the same passage, Dyer reads “Those who have virtue do not look for faults; those who look for faults have no virtue,” so I don’t think my critique has any leg to stand on. That said, it’s really the first two lines that unlock the whole passage for me. I become so preoccupied with writing something eloquent that I forget to actually, y’know, write. When it comes writing, this passage helps me reiterate a policy that is actually beneficial for my thoughts.

Type ‘em all and let the editor sort ‘em out.

Retire when the work is done;
this is the way of heaven.

Now this one, it’s only two lines. But they are perhaps the most profound of them all. So often I hang myself over the idea that what I write isn’t “finished.” The truth is, most things will never be “finished.” Growing to accept that fact allows me the chance to be “done.”

It doesn’t mean I can’t come back to these things. It just means that letting go for now will allow me to find the divine spark later and with greater ease. And it’s that probably a good place to see this one off; I got a Blazers game to catch.

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